


In Another Universe: 15x02 Coda

by Crossroads_Castiel



Series: No One Needs to Know [7]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angry Dean Winchester, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Coda, Comforting Castiel (Supernatural), Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Implied Relationships, M/M, Season/Series 15 Spoilers, Understanding Castiel (Supernatural)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-23
Updated: 2019-10-23
Packaged: 2020-12-28 18:30:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 952
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21141254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crossroads_Castiel/pseuds/Crossroads_Castiel
Summary: My ending to Supernatural episode 15x2. Dean and Castiel use their words and express their frustration.





	In Another Universe: 15x02 Coda

Dean stared up at the white ceiling panels above him and the counted the tiles. There were 30 full tiles in this room. He’d counted them ten times already, but sleep wasn’t going to find him. He knew he needed to sleep. Other hunters would need to rest soon, and it was his shift to rest…but it just wasn’t coming. He shifted on the gym mats he’d arranged on the floor and stared at the shadows of the desk and chair they’d shoved against the wall to make floor space. The door to the room was propped open so he could keep an ear on the noise of the evacuees. There was a small honey colored stream of light coming from the propped open door and no movement to indicate anyone was there, but Dean shifted his legs and stared at the crack of open door. He just knew….

“Cas…. you out there?” He was validated by a shift in the light. 

“Which answer would you prefer?” came a gravelly voice from the left side of the door. Dean sat up and rubbed his face. He knew he was being a jerk, but he was just….so…. angry. 

“Cas…” Dean said as he talked to the wood door. At his name, he appeared. He opened the door, letting more of the buttery light paint the off-white tile floor. He gently let the door close besides the gap and he leaned against the wall hesitantly. 

He stuffed his hands in the pocket of his trench coat and studied the floor. “I just thought with all the people disappearing…”

“You don’t have to watch over me.” Den growled out as he tried to see him in the dimly lit corner of the room. 

“I don’t do it because I have to,” Castiel said softly into the safety of his alcove. 

“Look.” Dean murmured as he squinted into the dark. “I’m…I’m sorry I’ve been kind of…” He felt Cas move toward him and suddenly he was sitting on the floor next to him. 

“Dean, I’m not upset with you for being angry. You have every right to be, and I’m sorry for the part I played in the anger you feel. I would never have intentionally put her in danger…” Cas said quietly without turning toward him. Dean swallowed back the biting comment he wanted to make. He didn’t want Cas to talk about her. He needed to be angry or he’d fall apart at everything they’d lost. 

“Just don’t,” He said through gritted teeth as he felt himself crumbling. 

Castiel sighed softly in the dark. “Dean, I don’t expect you to forgive Jack. In time maybe you will but I’m not asking it. To be clear.”

“Cas, he killed my mother!” Dean hissed softly, his hands trembling as he clutched the blanket they’d pulled from the trunk. 

Castiel sat quietly and seemed to be choosing his words carefully. He began cautiously. “We have all done things…hurt people…killed people…when we were not in our right minds. Me, Sam…. you, even your mother. Jack didn’t act in malice. He didn’t wish her dead. He loved her…which is more than I can say for the people I hurt when I absorbed the souls of Purgatory. My misdeeds were brought on by arrogance and pride. Jacks were brought on by losing his soul protecting us.”

“It doesn’t make her come back…” Dean said softly, his voice wavering. 

“Being angry helps, I know, Dean. I may not understand everything, but I understand that.” Castiel added as he turned toward him in the dark. 

Dean felt his cheeks reddening and he willed back the tears that would come if he just let himself go. “Shut up, okay. Just stop, Cas.”

“If that’s what you want,” Castiel braced himself and went to stand but felt Dean’s hand wrap around his own and pull him back down in the dark. 

“I didn’t say you had to go,” Dean said as his hand found Cas’ from his hold on his wrist. Castiel settled back beside the makeshift bed and their heads leaned together, both letting out a breath of relief they didn’t know they’d been holding. The silence spanned several minutes before Dean spoke into the dark again. “You can’t know Chuck didn’t make this happen.”

Cas’ thumb ever so softly made soothing circles on Dean’s hand as he spoke. “I suppose I can’t, but I believe he’s never been all that creative. He’s rewritten the same stories over and over. I choose to not give him credit for this one.” Dean sniffed quietly in the dark and Cas said nothing of the lone tear he knew Dean wiped away. He didn’t even look to acknowledge it. 

Dean’s voice was barely a whisper. “I’m sorry I’m not ready to forgive Jack.”

“And I’m sorry I can’t work with the demon wearing his face. I know it’s hard for you too,” Cas added as he squeezed Dean’s hand in his own. 

“I just wish…. I wish things could be different. That we could be different people.” Dean turned his face into Cas’ lapel, letting his shoulders relax for the first time in days. 

Cas hesitantly brought his free hand to gently run his fingers through Dean’s hair. He was quiet for several beats before answering. “I like to think in another of Chuck’s Universes we’re together…and happy. You grew up having your mother, Sam has a wife and children, and Jack is alive and well. I take comfort in that.”

Dean pulled away from Cas’ comforting hands and leaned back against the wall, letting out a shaky breath. “Yeah…in another universe, maybe. It’s a nice thought.”


End file.
